how could you not miss this?

its easy to sometimes feel alone, and to think about what you miss when you are away from most of your family going to school. growing up is hard, so many decisions to make and so much worry about what is the right choice... i sometimes wish that i could go back in time to my younger days.

Alana of the past: I was quite the crazy little girl. I don't really remember this as much as i have seen in it in home videos. I loved to be in the spotlight, even sometimes pushing people out of the camera frame. I loved to make up songs and sing them most had the lyrics "yes my friend" and i tried so hard to be just like my older sisters; so i loved the osmond boys, learned the songs they learned in choir and tried to be grown up like them. I couldn't keep a secret and couldn't lie, which made shopping for birthdays and other such events with me not so great. And i loved the power rangers.

i feel like so much has changed since then.. but i still want to be just like my older sisters and i am not so great at lying. I don't make up songs anymore my friends, but i do love lyrics of songs and have tried to help Angie write her songs. I don't like to be in the spotlight but i don't like to be looked over either. its been years since i've watched power rangers.

i don't really know where i am going with this.. but i just was feeling a little homesick/family sick tonight. it made me think about how i wish i was at home.. but how no matter what now, there are things i need to do in my life and it will never be easy.. so to help me get over this i want to change my feelings into ones of gratitude... which will just help you to understand.. how could i not miss this? my family that is

I am so grateful for my Dad.. i give him a hard time sometime, but i really love him a lot and look up to him with awe and amazement. I know that he would give me whatever i needed, and not just me, my sisters and my mom too. He is constantly serving all of us, and now the ward too. I know he is a great Bishop, i was nervous as to how his calling would affect me and it has made me love him so much more, and look up to him more. He as taught me so much through his quiet example. He is so amazing, and funny and i love to read his blog and i miss his cooking. People have told me many times how much they like my dad, or how good and cool he is.. i know, i just don't like to always admit it! And even though my dad is always bugging me about only dating canadians he needs to know that no guy will be able to live up to him.. and i will always be his little girl.

(I neglected to post this picture this summer.. my dad turned out not-so-nice grass in the front to the greenest healthiest lawn on the street. )

I am so grateful for my mom. She truly is an amazing lady! She is always serving others.. ALWAYS. I remember thinking that my mom didn't know how to say no to anyone, she was always doing things for others. She has taught me so many important things about life, from how to clean, cook to how to be a good mother, friend and serve others. She can play the piano, sew most anything and sings beautifully. This summer i had the opportunity to go on walks with her most mornings. I wasn't always ready to talk at that time, but i enjoyed everything we talked about and she told me. The transition from your mom being your mom to your friend is amazing! She is always encouraging me, and knows exactly what to say. Her notes that she has sent me or left me over the years are treasures! Thanks mom! i am excited to see you this weekend!

I am so grateful for my sister Candi. I had the chance to work a bunch of jobs with her and we grew really close. She helped me get transitioned into the singles ward and let her friends be my friends. We have had SO many good times together and i am sure we will have many more. We love all the same TV shows and she is a good person to get advice from, she is always honest with me and is a great workout partner. She is musical and is so smart. I laugh when i think about all the fun times we have had. And no one makes biscuits and gravy or corn fritters like her. We have a lot in common, not to mention the fact that yesterday we both made peanut butter cookies and put chocolate in them.. haha. i am so glad that we have become so close these past couple of years! Thanks for being such a good older sister, someone i can really look up to! i can't wait til you are done nursing and can travel and i can come visit you.

I am so grateful for my sister Angie. We have always had a strong bond. There is a story told about us, when i was just a baby and speaking what babies speak and no one could understand me, but Angie said she could.. and she repeated all the sounds i made word for word (even though they weren't even words). But we have always had that understanding between us. Sharing a room for most of our lives really brought us together. I have always looked up to her and i still do and i am amazed at all the things she does. she is always doing things for others and her kids. Her creativity is amazing and she is the most talented singer/guitar player. She is a great listener as well and we are the best cranium players ever, because we always just know what the other is thinking. I am really missing Angie right now, as she wasn't home this summer.. but we still remain close and i love that! I can't wait to go visit her in just under two months!! yay! thanks for always being there for me.

I am grateful for Mike. Okay sorry.. not the best picture of you, but it was one of the only ones i had of you.. and it made me laugh. So many times mike will make a face like this one and it means "uhh i dont' know if i/you should have said that" hahah. Mike is a funny guy with great taste in music. He really has a good heart and i am so glad that he is married to Angie. He has blessed her life so much and is such a good husband and father. i know he cares about me too and that makes me feel special and he still shares Angie with me! I am so proud of him for working so hard and making their journey in Hawaii possible. Thanks mike!


I am grateful for my sister Erika. We too have always been pretty close. I remember when we were little, people would ask us if we were twins.. haha and i would always wonder if they were stupid. But if people mistook me for Erika now i would be honored. She is SO smart and an amazing musician, she wowed me this past year in her highschool musical! I am so proud of her and i admire so many things about her. We have enjoyed some short road trips together and she is always up for what i have got planned. I miss her lots and i hope that maybe one day we can be roommates, because she too is a great listener and has good insight. She makes smart decisions and really cares about others! She is so beautiful and i am lucky to have her as my sister. Thanks Erika!I am grateful for Jamie. Jamie has always been so funny. Her sense of humor has us laughing all the time, she is so witty and is always up to something. Me and her are cuddle buddies and lots of my favorite memories of the summer involve me and her cuddling while watching movies. She impresses me so much with her desire to do whats right and she is very athletic. She is taller than me now, but will always be little JJ to me. i love her so much! I love hanging out with her.. and i am so glad she put all the jonas brother music on my computer, i listen to it and feel closer to all my sisters. I am so excited for Jamie because i know she is going to do some cool things in her life.. and probably a lot of funny stuff along the way. Thanks Jamie!

I am grateful for Jenelle. Jenelle is the baby, and with that she is a lot like my mom-- in the way she serves. She is always doing things for everyone! Being the youngest can't be easy.. i hope that i can be a good example to her, and that she knows how much i love her. She is my little beautician and i love that about her. I have taught her so much of what i learned in cosmetology and i will continue to tell her everything i know. She reminds me of me, because she seems a little boy crazy! She too is smart and i love how in tune she is to our feelings. I am so glad she is my baby sister! Thanks Jenelle!

I am grateful for Brylie. This little girl is the smartest 3 year old i know. My grandpa Anderson called her the wizard i think, and for good reason. She is just so amazing! She remembers so much and has a vivid imagination. I miss hanging out with her, she was always up to coloring, or watching a show with me. I am grateful she let me teach her some of my favorite songs from my youth and i hope she knows how much i miss her and love her. I am so excited to go to the beach with her and have her show me hawaii! She has been such a blessing in my life! Thanks Brylie!

I am grateful for Tyken. This picture was taken probably a week before he went to Hawaii.. and thats how i remember him. Just little in my arms! I have seen pictures and watched him on ichat and he is the cutest little guy ever! he brings me so much joy! i know that i am going to fall more in love with him when i go to hawaii to visit and i can't wait for that! He loves his mom so much and i love that about him! Thanks Tyken!

Well I am grateful for my family!!! I really do feel a lot better now! I miss them.. but i am just so grateful for them! Can't wait to see you all in Hawaii!