Tuesday, December 22, 2009

... life of a future sister missionary ...

i have debated whether or not to write some of my deep thoughts on my blog about my mission. the writing would be mostly a record for myself to look back on. and i hate to have TMI all over the internet of my life. but, when i started this blog, it was all about "this is me", and so it will continue, because my future as a missionary - well that's just me. this makes it sound like i wanna talk about deep serious stuff...

first things first - kudos to every person that has ever gone on a mission. it's not as easy as i always assumed it was. to get all the medical, dental, spiritual interviews and appointments done is one thing, and then to add the adversary trying to take you down into the mix, it made me feel like i would have more success at a one-on-one game with michael jordan.

there is so much i could say... and maybe i will continue to write about my life as i prepare to go on this mission to the Independence Missouri Visitors Center (IMVC as it will now be called in the future).

right now, i just need to get something off my chest that recently has bothered me: the fact that because i am going to the IMVC i have become somewhat of a writeoff to the opposite sex. my black tag has turned somewhat into the black plague. but not even just the opposite sex... there is this assumption to some that i am unable to date, or crush anyone because i have a call, or that some part of me is broken, but my mission should be able to fix that. Conversations that go as follows "Oh are you dating any--- oh wait you are going on a mission, nevermind" and "if you weren't goin on a mission, i would totally set you up with {insert hot guys name here}" frequent my life. (or even, 'well if you are supposed to get married, then he'll show up' which deserves a post of its own)

well they are right--- i am going on a mission, and no, i'm not dating anyone. but why can't {hot guy} still go out with me?

but what really gets me is that it even bothers me, because i hate dates. i could go without awkward conversations, fake smiles, and just the whole shabang... a boyfriend would really complicate my life right now too - but i have always been boy crazy, my friends and i have been since.. well as long as i remember. and i feel like lately my life has lacked a lot of the male companionships that i have always had. and it's not even like i am a person that has been asked on a lot of dates, but let me tell you, that there has been a steady decline of any male persons even hanging out with me since my plans for a mission have come forward. from some experiences that i've had and gone through more recently, i feel like it's safe to say that the sister missionary excuse is perfect for anyone trying to stay out of the dating scene, and people admire you for it.

this isn't my pathetic plea to have everyone set me up on dates, nor is it written because i want to go on dates - remember i HATE dates. it is true - i am not looking for love right now, or anyone right now except those looking for the message of the gospel. it's just interesting how some people swore that i would get married and not end up going on mission. So.. looks like they were wrong. and i am kind of proud of it. plus it is very difficult to do when the only man you converse with is your Dad or your brother in law... im just saying

but what do i know? i'm just a future sister missionary

**disclaimer** this post represents my thoughts and views, the information in this may not be entirely scientifically accurate or accurate in any way at all.


Melissa said...

I could see how that would be hard. It sucks though to be a write off. My point of view is that, your call doesnt mean you've stopped existing as a person. You arent just a name tag. And it sucks that people are treating you like your mission call negates you. Thats super frustrating. And crushes and hanging out with guys is just fun. Why does it all have to be marriage or nothing? It should be fun. More people should understand that.

Dawn said...

Boys....they're just always dumb!

That being said, forge forward sister! You'll go ... It'll cause you to learn and grow and become this amazing person...and when you come home some smart and much more handsome than all the other boys will say, "Hey baby! You're just what I've been waiting for?!" He'll be richer and smarter and nicer and spiritualer and handsomer than any of the others....so it'll all work out :0)

So happy you're going on a mission! Nothing will compare to this experience!

The Ortons said...

it is true.
I just can't wait for you to come down here and visit. i love you

KandyJill said...

Dude - I totally know what you mean! That's how I was treated at the beginning of the semester. In fact, Brady was unsure if he should ask me out, and when he finally did - ALL of his guy friends kept telling him to steer clear and not ask me out! Then all of his girl friends kept saying "things can change - girls change their mind about missions all the time"... so sometimes those stupid guys just need some encouraging. Because think: if Brady had listened to all his buddies and not asked me out... we wouldn't be engaged to be MARRIED in April now! So crazy how the Lord works. But I certainly know my dad is pretty excited to set you up on that one date. He talked to him about it and Ryan said "Yeah, she seems like a cool girl... and she comes by high recommendation!" - SO... :) I don't really know where I'm going with this comment! :S

I'm so excited for you to serve a mission.
I gave B a shot for the both of us... now serve the Lord for the both of us!
If it weren't for you, I don't think I would have had the faith to give B the chance I needed to! I owe you BIG time girl!
I love you.

Michelle said...

You're going on a mission? What an amazing experience you will have. You will be in our thoughts and prayers
God will Bless you as he uses you to help those in need
Do you know where you are going?
You should blog and post pics while you are gone. It would be wonderful to read about your mission
Best wishes